My Lord

There's been hills...
mountains you let me climb
I'm desperately searching for you
but I still can't seem to find
the only One who'd set me free
the One who used to talk to me
the One who showed me truth so real
in times when what my heart would feel
could be so hard understood
You asked me to stay and yeah, I would...

Forgive me, please, I didn't listen
I'm sorry for having a stubborn heart
You made me become a virtuous person
looking in the darkness for a ray of light
Forgive me for feeling insecure
for doubting if you'd stand here by my side
while you were holding the Heaven's door,
your heart, your love for me open wide

I am a woman with a humble heart
falling on her knees in front of you
begging you for mercy and a brand new start
using me for all you intend to do
I know that I'm nothing without your power
without your guidance I'm completely blind
so I'm walking towards your Ivory Tower
there's nothing from you I could ever hide

You taught me that people who'd touch your body
would be forgotten and seen no more
You taught me that some might touch you deeper
they'd reach the very bottom of your soul
The memories of the first will disappear
will be taken away by You very fast
The memories of the second will resist the time
in you they will live. forever last

You took away from me what was dear to me
You humbled and tortured me, pushed me down
You assumed I would leave, would lose my faith
just because you laughed at me, made me a clown
I know I'm not perfect, I can only try
over and over I stumble, I fall
I make mistakes, my apologies
I'm just a human, don't stand so tall
but one day I will reach to the bright blue sky
I will stand up and rise again
I will see through every single lie
stay strong with the next hit that I'll sustain...

When am I gonna be strong enough
to go forward like a soldier without fear?
When am I gonna be clean enough
so that thinking of you won't cause a tear?

You know me better than I know myself
You know my only heart's desire
in all humbleness I know I ask for too much
I know I'm water playing with fire
From the bottom of my heart I hope that You'll listen
I hope You will let me find my way
I'll pray that my wish will match Your plans
'cause I cannot wait for You to say
my wish has been heard in the Kingdom of Yours
You're sending them home with their flashing eyes
sending them home, knocking on the doors
my Lord, I'm making a wish on the falling stars...

(I assume, everyone puts the God's presence, His being at our side, in question once in a while.
Searching for Him is a journey full of rocks, but there's a happy ending.)